Monday, June 30, 2008

Why I lie

Whether a policy makes sense, is practical, or actually improves people's lives is of secondary importance to me. What is important is whether supporting or opposing that policy makes me feel good about myself. I'll almost always prefer a policy that's extremely expensive, difficult to implement, and helps almost no one, but seems "nice". Because most Americans make decisions about policies based on whether or not they believe the policy actually makes people's lives better or worse, to enact my policies I've become habitually dishonest about what I believe and what want to do. Lying about my agenda has become as natural to me as chasing a cat is to a dog.

Friday, June 27, 2008

Hate 'em all

Thursday, June 26, 2008

I have a copy of Mein Kampf and I'm not afraid to use it

The way I've built propaganda against Conservatives is the same way the way Nazi’s built propaganda against the Jew.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Stand clear of common sense common folk

I am sensitive to people's pet peeves when they're carrying a plainly visible gun on their hip.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Me so stupid

Today, I'm so stupid I got upset when an equivilancy was drawn between progressive taxation and grades in school.

Friday, June 20, 2008

Show me

Crazy as it may sound, I believed and continue to believe Hussein's Iraq wasn't armed with WMD.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Why I'm voting a straight Democratic ticket

  • Because I believe that the best strategy in war is defeat.
  • Because I believe that if I don't have enough money, the solution is for the government to take more of my money.
  • Because I believe that the ideal family is two homosexual bonobos, a goat and a parrot raising a human baby.
  • Because our enemies on the battlefield deserve comfy hotel rooms, Pay-Per-View, prostitutes.
  • Because I care about the real victims of crime - criminals.
  • Because everyone deserves crappy healthcare.
  • Most of all, I'm voting Democrat because I like the ideas they have over in France, but I don't feel like moving there.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Follow me

I love my neighbor. Indeed, my demonstration of this "love" has been to hijack the government and force government to force Americans to "love their neighbor" according to my definition of  "love."

Jesus Christ always gives you a choice to decide whether to love your neighbors as yourself; I do not.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

I'm markedly less ambitious today than yesterday

I don't want to take care of my family, I want the government to. I want the government schools to raise my kids. I'd rather not have a job - it seems government should supply my income, but if I have to work I don't expect to actually earn my pay - my union will extort it from my employer on my behalf.

Monday, June 16, 2008

Big idea day today

My big project of the 21st century is how to achieve global governance. Granted, this project is still in its infancy, but there are at least a few givens.

The basis of political society ought not to be the individual citizens but groups: racial, ethnic, gender, religious (only if non-Western), sexual orientation, et cetera). These groups should be divided into privileged (whites, males, Christians, heterosexuals) and the marginalized (non-whites, females, non-Christians, homosexuals). We definitely need to let go of the idea of national identity.

By repeating claims that the current form of government is plagued with "institutional racism," and "systemic sexism," along with homophobia, Islamophobia, and xenophobia, I seek to rob that government of its authority to govern.

Anyway, that's just a few of my ideas on how I'm going to get this global government ball rolling.

Friday, June 13, 2008


Thursday, June 12, 2008

Tearing down our defining institutions: a priority

I have a systematic desire to change or get rid of the institutions and traditions that have always defined and maintained our country's greatness.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Indifferent to America's decline

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Sure, lots of us Dems are secretly socialists

Like many Senate Democrats, I gosh darn believe most businesses should be run by government.

PS. Democrats eat shade-grown tofu and free-trade arugula while Republicans eat prime rib with French fries and deep-fried chili cheese logs.

Monday, June 9, 2008

A sovereign, loving hateful homophobic bigot

My gripe isn't with a hateful, homophobic bigot; rather my gripe is with my sovereign Creator who loves each of us in spite of being a hateful homophobic bigot.

Friday, June 6, 2008

My hypocrisy is born of my profound arrogance

I'm still in a state of denial over Obama's virtual free fall since the revelations about his associations with Tony Rezko, William Ayers and Jeremiah Wright. I suppose it's my breathtaking arrogance that allows me to insincerely call for unity while hypocritically expecting unanimous acceptance of my radical leftist agenda.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

I confess

After supporting full legal infanticide early in the day, I decided to give my friends in the corporate world, media and Hollywood a bit more time to soften up America before I completely cave in to the Pro-Sodomy, Pro-Gender-Confusion Agenda. Later in the day, I sought ways to force homosexuality into the armed forces and continued to create incentives for others to practice destructive and sinful sexual behaviors.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Words mean nothing to me

It really plucked my peacock when the Supreme Court handed the election to Bush in 2000. But when I say Bush was "selected, not elected," I'm not referring the Supreme Court decision - in fact, I'm referring the electoral college.

He's in there!

For the past year, I've been pretty busy pushing Obama and writing his speeches. I'd figured out that he was the best guy to get rid of the Clintons. Now that I've cinched his nomination I'm going to have some extra energy, so I thought I'd record some of my exploits with this blog.